Sunset Over Britain
By Bobmin
I know this is a late review, but in an earlier chapter you said that Harry's eyes had improved, but in this one he was wearing his glasses when Snape tossed him against the wall before the feast.
Is he just wearing them as a ruse, or have they only improved a little bit? Again, sorry it is a late review, so here is a gross of doughnuts,a 12" mead scope and a bakers dozen of portable tactical
nukes.
Ratboy
That was a nasty and uncalled for trick to play on Bullstrode. She was a bystander in all of that.
No wonder Slytherins hate Gryffindors.
And a violet-eyed DADA teacher. That reeks of cliche.
Another great read! Thank you for your hard work. Like the Ginny/Nev hint. Nice touch. Even though I'm not a H/H fan, this is a very believeable relationship. I even enjoy Draco this way.
Oh, Gawd ... make the pace slow down.. I can't stop reading... must work tomorrow, and yet, sleep evades me because I must read on. Aaah. Brilliant addictive tale.
Obviously you've had this chapter out for awhile and have possibly delt with my one criticism so far: near the start of this chapter, Voldemort was surprised to learn that Snape may still be a
spy. According to either fourth or fifth year - which I assume is the same as canon was - Snape was spared Azkaban by Dumbledore claiming he was a spy. Voldemort would have already known that Snape
had such ties with Dumbledore. This would have come up at the end of fourth year when Snape went to meet up with Voldemort as per Dumbledore's order/request.
It just seemed a little strange when I read it; I'm guessing you just wanted to get Snape away from Voldemort for the story, but I would have preferred it if it had been a little more subtle.
Anyway, you've possibly dealt with this query already, and its your story anyway, just thought I'd put my 2 cents in.
Other than that I'm enjoying the story, even though I really don't like the Harry/Hermione paring. The story is interesting enough that I will try to read it all - no promises of success, though, as
the pairing really bugs me.
/agree with the pet peeve
Interesting. I do love an author who turns a character on his head. Can't wait to see where you're going with Malfoy. I like. I like.
Interessting...
:)
Thanks
You know, I'm not even halfway through this chapter and I already hope that Dumbledore and Snape are killed later on, and soon. Seriously, I hate them. I think that the prophecy was not refering to Voldemort but to Dumbledore in canon. Why else would Voldemort have so much trouble killing Harry if only Voldemort and Harry can kill each other. They should be able to take each other out. Another plot hole! Dumbledore is not dead at the end of the 7th book, he's around somewhere and the dead body is a fake.
awesome story! simply amazing!
'I seriously doubt he wants someone he believes to be turning dark to run the club.' -- of course, none of the other students or the professors (or Rita Skeeter) thought of that.
I'm glad (I think?) that I was wrong about Rita's article.
'Harry had sensed her presence there as plain as day. Her aura was quite noticeable' -- I almost commented on this last chapter; how then did Rita go unnoticed? You foreshadowed this ability of
Harry's earlier, so I was a bit surprised when Rita went unnoticed. Certainly Harry would have been even more on edge/wary at the platform than in class -- perhaps it was the attack on Hermione that
caused this 'sense' to kick in. (So I raise the question and give an out at the same time -- well, sorta).
suggestions: you mean you're not going to go back and rewrite your story based on my erudite and witty observations, darn.
Why should anyone have a problem with Draco? This is AU after all. I used to be bothered by redeemed or nice Draco fics. But I've learned to enjoy most any good story. Besides HBP makes a redeemed
Draco easier (after all he couldn't go through with killing Dumbly; oh, bad example -- ok he is totatlly unredeemable), Snape, too, for that matter (unfortunately; he's just to fun to hate; but
that's why JKR wrote him).
As far as plausibility (or swallowability) of JKR is concerned; just one word: kiddie lit (ok, two words). Despite her lengthy books and their appeal to adults, the series remains kiddie lit, with
all of the suspension of belief required for the implausible things that happen in such works (as your comment, via Harry's harangue, on how events go in the books -- of course mere children would
not be able to circumvent traps intended to stop adults; but it has to be that way in a book written for children -- the kids are the heroes and figure everything out while the adults are clueless
(why do you think JKR named him DUMBledore, it wasn't an accident); just the nature of the genre.
Damn right on the pet peeve man... Bloody 'ell, I've read a 3000 word chapter ( which is really hard for me... you and many other writers have set my standers to at least 7000+ words PER chapter
now >_< ) and horrid grammer...
Exept your Authors attack fic... I laughed like a bloody buffon
Awesome. I...I...just WOW!
Poor Millicent (never thought I'd say that) but even she can do better than a bad-tempered turncoat.
So another long and great chapter;
I do love it when Harry can show Snape up, and I do hope that Harry press charges on Snape. I know what the hat meant be Brotherhood arising, legends of yore, as I think that the Brotherhood that
Harry and friends pretend to be over the summer are coming back, on Harry is meant to restart it.
LoL… Now I see what Harry did, Harry swapped Millicent and Hermione’s drink around, very nice indeed.
LoL… Nice, only Harry could do the impossible and Apparate in and out of Hogwarts. :D
The ass of a Headmaster shouldn’t have tried to read Harry’s mind… I wonder what the vision that he saw meant.
Am I right in thinking that Romany Blackthorne is in the Brotherhood? Oh by the way I like this character.
I love that Harry put Dumbledore down, when he tried to talk. Also putting Dumbledore in his place too.
Draco’s father is a real ass, how could he do those thing to his wife and son… no wonder Draco went to Harry for help. Harry is willing to help him on two conditions, the first is a new
handshake. The second condition will be harder for him, but its try and learn that full bloods aren’t the best of the Wizarding world.
Ron is a fool to try and get into trunk, in the end it could hurt him.
I think you're doing a great job without suggestions from those of us who read!!!!!!!
Oh I love it! This chapter is really great!
About the last comment I made before I hit the submit buttom...I hit me that I hadn't mention Ginny owning Ron. That was great but I can't see her mom and dad taking it too well.
On this chapter. Because of that artical should the Broad of Governors investigate the charges made by the Daily? I mean I'm from America,I don't know where you two are from (I don't really read your
A/N..expect the PPs) but if a newspaper made those kinds of accustions the teacher would be suspended 'until further notice' and the charges would be fully investagated...by the police as well.
Lets see...Snape is a greasy bastard *nods* I like stories when he's a 'good' guy and its realistic and I like them when hes...cannon because its so much fun to hate him!
As for little ol Ronnie boy? I think its time for some serious pay back. How about the rest of the House? You keep saying that the whole house has turned against him, but what do you mean by the
whole house? I can't see Colin Creepy or his brother...the Other Creepy turn against his Idol nor do I see some of the Seventh years, like the Team, turn against him on the say-so of Ron who's known
to be a jealous, spoiled (despite his lack of...funds) brat. Until (and I just realized that I've been spelling that with 2 lls....) Dumbledore stood up in front of the whole school and said "Harry
Potter is Dark!" I just don't see them believing that...
Yeah I think that's it...(and yes I know that the stories finished, really I do, I just say what's on my mind and what I think will happen.
Snape isn't Alan Rickman?
::cries bitterly::
Nooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(BTW, AWESOME story - you are one HECK of a story writer, Bob and Alyx!)
You're not the only one hating Malfoy, that's for sure, but I think in this case it's been a good choice to make him a good guys.
Wow. The story is awesome AND you respect other people's favored ships. I mostly like obscure ships but you pull off H/Hr with aplomb!
Anyway, I love this story!
-xxx- Malou