Kari posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 5:28am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

yay! more!... yum...

Fiona O'Neill posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 5:20am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

I enjoyed this chapter. I found the reaction of Arthur cute I'm sure no father wants to find out that his fifteen/sixteen year old daughter is having sex with her boyfriend.

One thing that struck me was how I had completely forgotten they were still in their sixth year, with so much happening I had the feeling that Harry's birthday had been and gone.

I find Arthur's reaction to Melinda endearing and find myself wondering how Charlie will react to his father forming a new relationship with another woman when thye don't know what happened to Molly.

I'm also curious about Ginny's new gift is she an empath or perhaps something else.

Did the bonding that Draco and Luna underwent make it easier for him to accept her emotional releases - perhaps not the best way to term that?

Anyway thanks for writing, looking forward to the next update

exar posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 4:58am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Great chapter you two. I would love to see you have an encounter with AD and HP soon, although I can understand your need for the alternate plot villian thing.

Maybe i forget with so many stories I read...but what happened to Fawkes and we he make an appearance again?

I don't really understand the whole Charlie is too stupid to see AD is a idiot but I can't wait to see how it turns out.

Also...prob the best story out there that has not been updated in ages is HP and the Mind Mage by James Milamber...my gosh that is a fantastic story I wish would get finished.

Meteoricshipyards posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 4:51am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Loved the scene with the twins being chased by giant crabs. Never really explained the shaking building, though.

The power the dark lord knows not - the power to lead. Good.

The image of Luna jumping on the bed was funny.

Marrage law fiction, anyone? Funny miscommunication scene with Arthur afterwards.

Dumbledore's scum. I hope his plans all fall flat, and his captured by lizard lips. Or is that snake face? Whatever.

Good chapter. Thanks for writing. Keep up the good work.

Tom A.

beauty01021 posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 4:40am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

yeah great chapter can't wait for more so pelase update again soon.

Riven posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 3:49am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

absolutley wonderful chapter.
i hope they figure out about spy charlie before he tells dumbledork anything too secret.

loved the weasley twins, and the whole sex talk was awsome. thank you for this wonderful chapter.

patrik svensson posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 3:43am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Great story,
keep up the good work.

Opinions are like assholes.
Everyone has one - but some just smell worse than others.

Sean Li posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 2:49am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Chapter "A New Ally..." last line, should be owe intead of own.

Nitpicks!

You like your Bond and LotR references, what with Q and the Prancing Pony, eh?

Joe Ritter posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 2:36am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Great Chapter. I loved the talk with Arthur and Melinda miscommunication over "they have to get married." Also, how did you know that we dread the Author's Notes. Do you dread them too?

Oh well, please ignore us whiners and keep writing your vision.

Ben Russell-Gough posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 2:30am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

First, sorry for not reviewing chapters 2 and 3. I was kind of busy those days and got out of the habit *cringes*

Well, things certainly seem to be hotting up. The old-style teaching methods of Eocho seem to be developing our heroes' powers faster than before. I find myself wondering how this pair bonding ritual may affect matters too.

Dumbledore seems likely to be the villain of the sort of 'middle portion' of this story. He is Voldemort's enemy but that doesn't make him Harry's friend or any kind of asset in the struggle to come. Let's face it, Dumbledore can't really imagine any kind of world where he isn't king.

I find myself wondering how long Charlie will be able to function as a spy. If he were to meet Harry directly, I think that the boy's powers would scythe through the defences that Dumbledore created like they were wet paper. Of course, that would depend on Harry knowing that it was necessary. That is where Ginny will come in.

I remain interested in seeing what Molly is doing right now. I am still of the opinion that she is Voldemort's Vice Secretary for Family Resettlement and Child Re-Education. Basically the big, bad kiddie brainwasher-in-chief.

Your usual fine work, although the chapters are getting a bit too long, to the point where they intimidate the reader.

BenRG's Rating: 7/10

shlager_5321 posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 1:34am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

great chapter!!
i cant seem to shake the thought that the new comunning talent that you siad the Harry will learn will lead to the brotherhood to find about charlie and bumbel-bee...
again great chapter and i cant wait for the next but i do have a question-
what is happening to Mad-Eye?? i dont think it is possible that he died or that he was captured by moldy-worts so where is he??
update soon

erin_colien posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 1:20am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

nice update looking forward to the next.

carlinonthebrain posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 1:04am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

great chapter. i have to wonder about the reactions of Ginny and everyone else once they discover that Charlie is spying for Dumbles, even if he has been semi-brainwashed. Worst, what will Harry do? other than that, no problems or other things, just another great chapter

Paulo Weber posted a comment on Friday 13th January 2006 12:06am for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Hey, nice part, and the Q branch is amazing. And the updateless list is ... interesting *opens up the last unifinished part of Black's War*
About Charlie and Dumbledore, let's hope the Weasley sees the light, his family has suffered too much already.

AK posted a comment on Thursday 12th January 2006 11:23pm for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Hum what you mean you got kicked off fanfic.net... You still got two stories there... Anyway. Myabe it is because I am waiting a week or so between each of your chapters but I get the feeling that the story is progressing way to slowly, it's like you got too many threads to cover at once wich is why the story seems to barely progress in time (or maybe ive been smokin not sure about that). Oh and if you put story on the Updateless List Put this one (I'm annoyed at the author cause its a really nice story and has not been updated for ever) : Backwards compatible by Ruskbyte (http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1594791/1/) Maybe if everyone annoys him he will update? :)
Right so to finish this pointless review, good story guys! keep workin on it I for one really look up to your next post :)

Sim posted a comment on Thursday 12th January 2006 11:20pm for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Hello. I'm usually a lurker with good fics, but recent discussions on Tim's group is making me re-evaluate that.

So ahh, first a nitpick - In the New Ally section, last line (He smiled at her. "It looks like I own you two favors now.") own should be owe.

Secondly, a personal discourse (aka living my own dream through your fic) - I like SuperHarry fics, and I really love that you have given him a gammy leg. (Very Ian Flemming - even if he's not a villain.) However, not happy that Eocho has given him a way around it. I was really looking forward to him having to work around it in the final show-down.
Oh! - and don't kill Dumbledore! I love the Dumbledore bits.
(andIwanttoseemoreMcGonnagalasacat)

A comment irrelevant to the story - I miss the Pet hates. I share most of your pet hates too, but one you haven't mentioned is US English-speaking wirters who freely substitute the word bloke/blokes for the (more American) slang guy/guys... Yes, you don't do this, well not in a way that has made me cringe, but I thought that I'd share.

And a bit of a squee! - Thankyou for being so original! The sunset/sunrise series is so refreshing and different!! Your story introduced me to ffa.net, and for that I'm eternally grateful. Characterisation is done brilliantly - not just focused on the canons with obligatory interaction with plot-driven character X who fills purpose and then returns into the background. This chapter (and review) has me up till 02:30 because I had to read it before going to bed. Thankyou for sharing it with us.

Shawn Pickett posted a comment on Thursday 12th January 2006 11:08pm for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Nice chapter, I was amused/impressed with Ginny taking such a forcefull role with her father across the board. Let's hope the others take her suspicions about Charley seriously. The bit with the twins doing the q-branch bit was funny, I look forward to seeing what mayhem they can unleash. Great job, thank you.

kittykatluver posted a comment on Thursday 12th January 2006 11:05pm for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Nice "Updateless" list. I'll go read it. Anyway, nice chapter! I really like the 'talk' between Arthur and Melinda...I like that name...

TheBlackPearl posted a comment on Thursday 12th January 2006 10:59pm for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

Fantastic read as always. I do hope Ginny can figure out why Charlie is bothering her before any real damage is done.

Curious about who was doing the buying in the U.S. Maybe Lucius?

Loved seeing Marvin in the disclaimer. Priceless.

Pam

Makileus posted a comment on Thursday 12th January 2006 10:50pm for Chapter 5 - Relationship building

I am glad that Harry's leg wasn't magically all the sudden fixed. Gives crediance to the story. Don't know what to say that has not already been said. Curious if you are continue to do fanfics after this one, and if you have an idea for your next fic.