By Bobmin
Reviews
jeffstrauser@yahoo.com posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 4:22pm
Awesome chapter!!!! I love the fact that your going away from what you know and are good and writing and doing something you haven't done before, that just shows your great writers! You made mention on your yahoo group that you were thinking of going to 8 chapters, how many are you thinking it will actually end up being? Do keep up the awesome work and update soon please!:):):):)
sollord posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 4:04pm
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I find the disclaimer very funny as with all your Disclamers. Might be amusing for some Dislcamer like SI fiction Omakes :P
I prefer to review the Disclaimer so I can be GR-Who-Must-Not-Review!
Dragon63 posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 3:41pm
"This is a departure from our usual writing style and we're experimenting."
As far as *this* reader is concerned, the experiment is a resounding success! The slowly developing relationship, and the mutual examination of various insecurities is both touching and realistic. Harry and Hermione are both still teenagers, yet both are maturing quite nicely in your story.
I like this experiment, and am always looking forward to more. Thank you both for sharing with us...
busted posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 3:35pm
I am really enjoying this story and I like the fact that Harry and Hermione are so innocent and insecure at first in the relationship. It is definately more realistic since neither have ever been in a serious relationship before and both had child hoods where they were picked on. Its cute the way they treat each other. Its also fun to watch there relationship grow not just all of the sudden having them be totally comfortable telling each other everything and having sex the first time they mention having feelings for each other. Some people may think they should but i definately like it this way alot better you are doing a fantastic job with the story and there relationship so far.
I would have to say that it is more enjoyable having something to look forwad to as there relationship progresses instead of everything being done straight away.
Events are moving along well and the story line is easy to follow and isnt filled up with lots of useless moments that dont add to the story. Some stories I find start to bore me when there is to much unessasery information.
Anyway I would just like to say i think you are doing a wonderful job and look forward for more to come.
AK posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 2:56pm
Great Cahpter, rite more!
P.S. I'd create a user named GR-42 but it's too much of a hassle.
P.P.S. Fiction: literature in the form of prose, esp. short stories and novels, that describes imaginary events and people.
P.P.P.S. The comment on science was something of a follow up of one of Bob's posts on the forum, no need to be snippy.
rippergirl posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 2:16pm
Yay.Luv it. You are both such awesome authors. I luv checking my email and seeing that I have an update to one of your stories. And I love how you can write something long enough to keep you interested for awhile unlike some of these stories that you can read 50 chapters in an hour because they are so short. Anyway can't wait to see if they find the brooch and definitely can't wait to see Sirius' wedding.That would be interesting with them both being such prankers.Til then write fast.
Hemotem posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 2:13pm
Woot another great chapter thank you. I am glad you are taking the ship slow. Now for the last horcrux's (sp?) get the brooch from some antique dealer having an auction would be cool to see.
Cheers
Hemotem
patrickokc posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 2:02pm
Wonderful story guys!!! Love it!!!
He was chased by a newly discovered species of humans called IRS Revenuers, but he eluded capture in thanks to his patented bat suit.
Wow this is said almost like you want to get audited! I had tears running down my cheek when I read this, very good description of those pesky agents.
Really guys this story is a lot of fun to read and I cannot wait to read the next installment. Also cannot wait for your x-men xover...I don't care what the others on the Forums say you could write a Harry Norbert story and I would read it lol. Thank you again for writing this and LONG LIVE THE LLAMAS!!!
Patrick
Potter Thinker posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 1:47pm
This story has been absolutely brilliant. Update soon!
Kalen Darkmoon posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 1:27pm
*nervously eyes headstone labeled "Generic Reader #6"*
Uhm... It really is a great chapter though and I really do want you to write more.
*eyes Alyx's shovel*
But that's not all I have to say! Really!!
I love how you have been portraying Harry and Hermione's growing relationship. Where they must learn to overcome their insecurities as they explore their relationship and slowly expand their limits as they overcome those insecurities. Just as you said in your author notes, it is more realistic and that makes for all the more enjoyable read. Stories like this are my absolute favorite among fan-fiction because too often the believable, realistic human reactions and behavior is lost among the events of the story. A perfect example is canon HP where the characters became increasingly less real to the reader as the story progressed.
Manatheron posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 1:18pm
My only nitpick:
"Hermione," Harry said warningly. "Everyone here knows you passed every class with top marks."
"We heard about your marks as well, Harry. Ten out of ten, and very good grades at that," Emma said.
I could have sworn you said he only got eight of his possible ten, and I really don't think that a 'P' would count as a good grade, even if it was in a minor class.
Outside of that... Alyx use a heavier shovel next time, they don't wake up so fast. Bob... Um... <.< >.> (Checks for Alyx) Sleep lightly and leave a light on...
Bobmin356 replied:
It's already been fixed. Thanks.
Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 1:15pm
Well, that was an eventful chapter. I rather like how both Harry & Hermione reflect the insecurities of the teenage years, it rings true for both; though I do find it a bit amusing just how their fears mirror each other. I'd argue that this is definitely an indication of just how in tune they are.
The Weasleys definitely did not come off looking that good in this chapter and, really, I suppose that shouldn't be surprising. Despite Mr. Weasley's interest in things muggle, the rest don't seem to have outgrown the predjudices of the British Wizarding World. I wonder what Molly would've said if she'd upbraided Harry for not showing more respect as a foreigner and he'd replied that respect was earned, not gifted, and that British wizarding was well behind the times in a lot of areas? Methinks she'd have been outraged and not bothered to think it through.
I almost feel sorry for Nagini, almost I say, since she'll have made that long journey only to find that the help Tom sought is no longer available. Somehow, I'm not at all certain being incarcerated in Azkaban is really going to save Lucius.
I loved Minerva's scene and I daresay she'll be as supportive as she can.
Finally, I wonder if anyone has a rpm counter on Walpurga Black's coffin, I'd love to know how fast she's spinning in her grave at Sirius marrying a muggle.
You've got a very interesting and believeable alternate story here and I'm quite enjoying it.
at a loss for words posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 1:11pm
I don't normally review as I should but both of you diserve thanks and commendations on all of your stories. I love them. In referance to the "special notice" I must say that the new style that you take is just as intriguing and I can't wait for the next chapter. Thanks for it and keep writing!
MonCappy posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 12:34pm
This chapter made me intensely dislike both Molly and Ginny.
Sarah5 posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 12:15pm
Entertaining chapter you always leave us hoping to see what is comming next.
T.Zukumori posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 12:14pm
Dear Bob & Alyx:
Well, I enjoy the introspective conversations in your character-development-driven story, so no worries there. Just one quick correction:
She shook her head. "You can't, Mr. Potter. You'd be recognized in an instant and people would want to know why your back."
I believe that should be a "you're".
Thank you for sharing your writings with us. I look forward to the next installment.
-T.Zukumori
Ian Drimes posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 11:56am
Great Cahpter, rite more!
Can I get some of that rack action now? ):D
Seriously, I am really enjoying it, both the plot and the writing style.
Clayton Rickey posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 11:46am
Pretty good and really funny. On a side note, it would have been scarier if it was Bob wearing the dominatrix outfit. ;)
Thanach posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 11:42am
while i thoroughly (sp?) enjoy your normal event driven stories, I must say, this story is far and above one of you're best works. The character development is marvelous, and the story flows well from your pen. Please I can't wait to see and what happens.
Oh, and snake skin shoes from Nagini?
How about snake skin wand holsters, wallets, and a purse or two for the ladies...
sanghamitra posted a comment on Friday 16th November 2007 5:06pm