Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:49am

Moody may be an old warhorse but I’d rather he was working for me than against me.
"Thou art a gem among a field of dull stones and thy brilliance doth dazzle the eye and taketh away the breath!" Actual Shakespeare or just the flavor?

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:44am

Wow wow wow!

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:40am

"Well, that might be true for a Weasley, Ginny, but you're a Longbottom now," Luna said with a sniff. "Besides, that curse died out a long time ago. The Weasley family just didn't realize that it hadn't passed through the generations and did their best to fulfill a curse that no longer existed. " self-fulfilling huh
"I'm going to have cast a permanent cushion charm on her if she ever gets pregnant," -- excellent idea Remus.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:36am

Poor Harry he can’t even go on a honeymoon without being a hero (to more than his new wife of course). But yes he saved the library. Any chance of getting some of that material to the light of day.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:30am

The Enchanted Goat? Could he be more obvious. Though of course he probably didn’t let it get spread around much about his brother. Anyway you look at it the name brought a chuckle out of me.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:23am

Excellent use of details. Not too many and not too few.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:21am

Picking up garbage for being too rowdy...excellent punishment.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:17am

Excellent chapter.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:15am

Favorite line: "We asked earlier if we could help, but you didn't take us seriously. I'm afraid we have a bit of a reputation and it got in the way this time." Very good job with the twins.

Something I wonder about: If it is possible to just shrink your books and put them in your pocket, why would you need a large bookbag? Wouldn't this be a spell they should teach first year students. After all we get warned about the problems that can be caused by carrying a bookbag that is to heavy. (Sorry it just popped into my head.)

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:09am

So Dumbledore tries to plant seeds of poison in Charlie. At first I thought Charlie wouldn't fall for something like that, but then I remembered that he didn't have as much exposure to Harry and had to much to Dumbledore. Good job.
The Death Eaters really have no chance now that the twins are on board. I'm glad I don't have to wait to find out what marvelous mischievous magic they come up with.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:05am

"Odd man, she thought. Attractive, in a rumpled sort of way, means well, but odd." All part of the charm, my dear, all part of the charm.
The scenes between Hermione and her parents are amazing.
"Mr. Lupin is a good man, a strong man, but a quiet one. I like that in a person. You can feel his strength without him bragging about it," that’s a perfect description of Remus. Great job.
Harry===knocking down prejudices by not knowing them. Wonderful!

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 1:02am

Awesome chapter. Olga and Sven are such wonderful characters.

Selma Flamel posted a comment on Wednesday 6th June 2007 12:59am

Why doesn’t old Voldemort understand the overwhelming number of muggles. With the time line that he should have been in the orphanage wouldn’t he have seen major acts of violence. I doubt if they blocked it from the kids.

Politicians were notoriously strange people

I think Gurprit calling Lavender daughter made me more emotional than the rest of this chapter

GryffindorDragon posted a comment on Tuesday 5th June 2007 10:38pm

Nicely done

GryffindorDragon posted a comment on Tuesday 5th June 2007 5:52am

You had a double negative in the disclaimer, so you do claim rights regarding Harry Potter.
'the a group of ten' -- just 'a group ...'
'the hair on little Brendan head' -- Brendan's head
Why wouldn't the rings recognize the Weasley's divorce?

GryffindorDragon posted a comment on Monday 4th June 2007 8:01am

Dumbledore's got Charlie wrapped up in a conspiracy mentality; anything evidence he comes across against Dumbly just serves to reinforce it. I wonder if Charlie is going to be rescued.
'Even the water was watered down' -- another line I shouldn't like, but do.
'The man looked about as dangerous as a neighborhood girl scout selling cookies' -- but don't you know the girl scouts are actually martial arts experts trained by the house of Flying Daggers

GryffindorDragon posted a comment on Monday 4th June 2007 6:48am

The prank on Tonks was very good.
'he's had a hard time accepting the divorce' -- ?? has this come up in the story before? Aside from Charlie going to look for Molly (would that necessarily indicate he's not accepting the divorce?), I don't recall seeing anything. So Dumbledore performed some of his 'memory charms' on Charlie? he comes across as a rerun of Ron. I have to err on the side of those reviewers who have trouble with Charlie; while Arthur may have withheld criticism of Molly, is it likely that all letters sent to Charlie would've failed to mention the systematic theft of Harry? Charlie's behaviour is understandable either as Charlie coming from an informational vacuum and accepting Dumbledore's version based on his having saved his life (and being his former beloved headmaster) or (and that former possibility doesn't seem likely as you don't have Charlie coming from an informational vacuum -- his family [not just Arthur and Molly] has been sending him letters) while Charlie was in a weakened condition Dumbledore tampered with his mind like he did with Ron.
I think the tension Dumbledore creates in the story is extremely plotworthy (even if a bit distracting as the story is supposed to be about the retaking of England from Voldie). But is Charlie the best vehicle for Dumblie's machinations?
Ok, I apologize for overanalyzing your story.

GryffindorDragon posted a comment on Monday 4th June 2007 5:15am

Wizards and Jello -- that's a riot.
'Rupert and Sons, Antiquities' -- are they archaeologists or do you mean Antiques?

GryffindorDragon posted a comment on Monday 4th June 2007 3:58am

'families had been executed in order to get people working' -- perhaps family members; you might get me back to work by threatening my family and by showing me the threat is real by "making an example" of some members, but if you execute the family (and not just some members), I doubt that would work to get me back to work.
'the letter he was talking about was his own' -- don't you mean the letter was her own
'The evil upon him was forced their' -- forced there
I missed Ginny and Neville going before the stone.
I feel sorry for Charlie. I hope you get him away from Dumbly eventually.

GryffindorDragon posted a comment on Monday 4th June 2007 2:34am

I just realized that Grandfatherly voice must belong to Dumbly. Grrr. Talk about out of the frying pan and into the fire.