Darke Gray posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 4:17am

Wow, that was a great story. Even though you say its a dark fic in the title, it really isn't, Harry didn't go all Voldemort on people, killing and torturing for fun and the hell of it, he was getting revenge for what Dumbledore and the rest of his friends at Hogwartz did to him when Voldie came a knocking. I love how you made it Hermione and Ron being the ones to come to get Harry's daughter too. Even though I wish you could of said what happened to some of the specific people, like the Weasleys, Hermione, Dumbledore and the rest of the Hogwartz staff but still, a great story, I hope to see more from you guys soon.

KenF posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 4:16am

There was Dark, but Harry wasn't it. Messing with someone's family is just asking for kicking.

emccall3 posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 4:16am

excellent as always

Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 4:01am

*snicker* Oh, now *that* was a fine plot bunny to play with. I'd say that the wizarding world earned what it received there, though I suspect that their egos never expected such a reaction. If I feel pity for anyone, it'd be for Hermione who let herself descend to the level of the wizarding world rather than try to better that level. In the long run, the unifcation was clearly for the best but it was the wizarding world that forced it to be so violent, they had to try to steal rather than deal straightforwardly.

IssaBissa posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:59am

Wow!!!!! I loved it!!!! You did a great job here!!!!!

Itisme posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:50am

I really like stories with angry Harry, but this one lacks something: After a fine buildup, and a nice climax.... What happened to Granger, Weasley and Dumbasadoor?

DrT posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:46am

Well, it probably would take a 'magus' to bring about unification to insure fair play on both sides.

Of course, Harry & family should have fled into deeper cover once the letter came, but then you'd not have had as good a story

Mickey posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:40am

Interesting story, although I'd think there would have been quite a few royal wizards after Merlin - The statue of secrecy was only passed in 1692 after all so I'd think many of the royal wizards up to that point would have been real wizards.

Lon Huey posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:33am

Huh. That was different. And thanks for that, as HPFanFiction has become a bit stale for me.

I'd love to see a story or two about the holdouts living in caves, clinging to the old ways, similar to the stories of Japanese soldiers hidden away decades after WWII was over. Maybe they would be the next revolutionaries to overthrow the new authoritarian government after Harry passes on.

A little revolution now and then is a healthy thing.

James Kennedy posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:32am

Responding to Bobmin's response to my post:
Regretfully I am going to strongly urge you to stop reading our work. If this bothered you, then nothing we write will please you.

Dumbledore will always remain what he was in canon, evil disguised as a benign grandfatherly figure. As for the buffed Harry stories... well they are fun to write.

Honestly if you don't like what you're reading, why are you reading it? Why aren't you out there writing your own stories?

I can live you you not liking the story I knew in writing it that it wouldn't appeal to many. Please, do yourself a favor and go elsewhere. Oh and no, sorry, you can't get your money back either. :)

You seem to have mistaken my constructive criticism of your piece as an attack. However, to answer your questions, I read because I like to read.

I liked 'Sunset/Sunrise,' and there are times when you have Dumbledore portrayed as someone a bit more complex-- I actually like your current characterization of him in 'Mutant Storm' as someone who has his conflicts but seems to be good, which is why I limited my criticism of your characterization of Dumbledore as being in a few of your previous fanfics.

However, I do disagree with you as far as how canon portrays Dumbledore. Dumbledore is a complex figure-- not a villain, but someone who knows how power can be seductive and cause damage to people.

As far as writing is concerned, I have written nonfiction. I can write about things that have happened, but I'm not all that creative when it comes to storytelling. Having some friends who are published writers made me realize where my talents are, and they don't reside in fiction.

freakyfinger posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:29am

Truly an amazing piece. I love how it has a giant scope in that it reaches the entire wizarding world as well as the muggle world, but it's all wrapped up in a one-shot. I would like to see it longer, kind of like Wizard Fall did. But we are ruled by the plot bunnies and muses aren't we?

bjon66 posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:25am

Excellent story.. As powerful as Harry was he would not need any help from the muggles.. His daughter could have taken Hogwarts apart herself..lol..It was still a killer story,, good job as usual..

Jamie46 posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 3:15am

I loved that :) Maybe a little dark, but not as dark as your disclaimer made it out to be. :-D I thought it was unique, creative, and very, very well-done. Thanks for sharing! :)

hordac85 posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 2:48am

Excellent.Keep it up
You mentioned Cheyenne Mountain.Is there a sequel to this story that involves StarGate?I would love to read one.

Carol Layland posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 2:46am

another wonderful story from one of my very favorite author couples.

betsymc51 posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 2:38am

Loved it!!! Quite a departure for you two but very inventive and different that anything I have read before. Thank you for all the time and energy you spend entertaining us!!

jeffstrauser@yahoo.com posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 2:28am

Awesome story!!!! I wanna know who gave you the idea for this rabid plot bunny so I can give them my thanks!!!!

James Kennedy posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 2:16am

When you mentioned in a note to 'Mutant Storm' that you were going to explore new directions, I was hopeful. Unfortunately, Dumbledore continues to be a bad guy, a role you've given him in a few of your previous fanfics. Harry, yet again, is Super!Harry. About the only thing I found interesting was the use of ifreets, so you a get a plus for that use.

I'm disappointed with this fic because I don't think you've gone in a different direction. You're using your same major character archetypes that you've used previously (Bad!Dumbledore & Super!Harry) in a different setting.

Even though you may argue (and rightly so) that Dumbledore is a supporting character in this piece, he's always been a commanding figure so whatever he does is noticed and obeyed; therefore, he is in essence a main character.

I consider 'Exposure' to be a misstep. I hope your next story is much better.

Bobmin356 replied:

Regretfully I am going to strongly urge you to stop reading our work. If this bothered you, then nothing we write will please you.

Dumbledore will always remain what he was in canon, evil disguised as a benign grandfatherly figure. As for the buffed Harry stories... well they are fun to write.

Honestly if you don't like what you're reading, why are you reading it? Why aren't you out there writing your own stories?

I can live you you not liking the story I knew in writing it that it wouldn't appeal to many. Please, do yourself a favor and go elsewhere. Oh and no, sorry, you can't get your money back either. :)

whatareyouevensaying posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 2:09am

Brilliant story, I'm glad that most of the canon characters were mere footnotes. It seems fitting for a project of this magnitude.

Mark Safransky posted a comment on Saturday 9th May 2009 2:07am

Very cool fic! I really like the realization the wizards had when they learned that their betrayal of Harry came at such a cost. The assault of Hogwarts was very neat. Hope to see more fics from you soon!