Mutant Storm
Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
By Bobmin
Reviews
Kairan1979 posted a comment on Tuesday 14th July 2015 12:11pm for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
I have to agree with Jean; Xavier isn't exactly innocent in this story. Though it fits with Xavier we know from canon - one that made the whole world forget about the four students he sent to suicide mission on Krakoa because Cyclops couldn't handle the survivor's guilt. Or hid the truth about Danger Room's sentience.
kitus posted a comment on Friday 18th January 2013 1:22am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Holy hell, batman! this....wow. great concept, well executed, and i can't wait for more!
oh look, a next button...shiny!
Keeroo92 posted a comment on Thursday 10th February 2011 7:57pm for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Hmm... Does anyone EVER ask Harry what he wants before deciding for him? Xavier just decided who would teach him what without asking if he even wanted to learn. Are all old men just meddling fools?
darksidhe posted a comment on Tuesday 21st September 2010 10:45pm for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Holy wow. Um. I was bored last week, so I re-read some of my favorite HPFF ever, SOB and SOB. When I finished it, I was in the mood for something a little wonky, so I tried this. Wow! Intense and emotional... An almost archtypical Order meeting, with Fred and George taking up their traditional (but very cool- and it's why we love them) roles. But Snape... nice twist, the way he was rubbing Dumbledore's face in it. It was almost enough to make me like the bastard. Almost. I feel bad for poor Mooney, though. Anyway, fantastic start! NEXT CHAPTER!
sirchris posted a comment on Saturday 26th June 2010 5:02am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
I have mixed feelings about this chapter, if I am being honest. As an avid fan of X-Men (and understanding and not minding in the least the AU aspects of this story, those seem pretty awesome) I think the dialogue for Xavier was not like him at all. It seemed way more direct than I am used to him being.
In fact, overall I'd say the dialogue was poor and felt really, really weird. I've read a lot of your stories (although I am late to the party on this one) and I think your dialogue is usually a bit better in your other works, but maybe I am just being nitpicky this one time.
Aside from that, however, you did quite an impressive job blending everything together. I rolled my eyes at the whole sister connection but the top tier patch job you did to make it seem plausible admittedly impressed me. I like Jean a lot and have absolutely no problem with her being related to Harry, and having a look-alike is A-OK for the job.
This looks very promising, and I will continue to read on, as the level of intrigue is well worth it. Sorry if I seemed too negative with the dialogue, I am pretty harsh on that in general as I love dialogue.
- Chris
ghostchicken posted a comment on Thursday 24th June 2010 9:09am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
I'm not a big fan of crossovers, but occasionally one or two pop up that are pretty good...and even believable. This is one of them. I'm truly impressed. Jean Grey-Summers would look very much like Lily, wouldn't she? Very clever. I shall read on.
ZaneM posted a comment on Tuesday 4th May 2010 8:37am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
A very, very good start to what i'm sure will be an impressive story.
I've enjoyed the word you two bring forth over time and this screams B&A, or A&B, whoever happens to be dominant at this point in time =]. While normally i'm not very happy with H/G, I've come to realize over the months that its not a problem I have with G, its a problem I have with R/Hr, I've been a H/Hr fan for so long that I simply am not very fond of seeing blatant and OOCish R/Hr so automatically that takes away half of H/G since it is to cannon.
A R/Hr affection scene gives me the same sort of feeling that Male Slash affection scenes give me, I don't loathe it, but it makes my stomach knot up uncomfortably.
Thanks for the chapters and I'll be sure to keep reading this excellent story.
Yours truely...
-Zane
Sond posted a comment on Thursday 25th February 2010 5:25am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Well it's been a while since I checked your website and now I noticed this one. Normally I hate reading fics that are still in progress cause I can't stand clifhangers but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt since the idea intrigued me a lot.
I like the first chapter and enjoyed reading a fic that is written intelligent and actually comes across quite believable even though it's an AU-Crossover.
Expect some praising in the next chapters and probably some cursing in the last :)
Cheers,
Sammy
Mozes posted a comment on Tuesday 2nd February 2010 9:26am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
I have to ask this and if I seem like a newbie doing so... ah well life goes on.
What the heck is it will all the llamas? Having returning home from the war this past week I have been a couch- potato for a least 25% of each day re-reading some of your stories which were unfinished when i was shipped out and in each one I find such a reference at the beginning.
Now having asked my question I intend to return to the top of this page and to start reading a completely new story.
Mozes
Aurilia posted a comment on Thursday 31st December 2009 3:08am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Nifty. Though I never really followed X-men (aside from having seen the first 2 movies a few times and vague memories of watching the cartoon as a kid), I do love a good crossover. You've got me intrigued!
WhiteElfElder posted a comment on Saturday 12th December 2009 11:01pm for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
This is interesting. How strong is Harry if he was able to release that level of mutant power shock wave? Would Magneto have picked this up? Voldemort could possibly be used as a catalyst to bring mutants together, at least for a short time.
Major Attitude posted a comment on Monday 7th December 2009 9:58am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
I like what I'm reading so far.
FailGate posted a comment on Monday 29th June 2009 10:50pm for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Very good chapter. Loved the Harry you portrayed at the Dursleys. He's put up with a lot of crap, and its always good to read where hes finally reached his limit (and can do something about it). Theres not enough really good Xmen/HP crossovers out there in my opinion, and this definitely is on the high end of the scale, if not the bar raiser itself.
Of course this is but the first chapter, so it could go downhill by all means... but I dont think it will.
SO yeah, great chapter, great Harry.
thyrokio posted a comment on Saturday 16th May 2009 1:48pm for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Pretty neat powers he has, so hes come close to being evil but he's being led back to ''the light''?
Good work
j_finchfletchley posted a comment on Wednesday 13th May 2009 6:55pm for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Well, this interests me, I have to say — not least because it involves the merging of two of my favourite universes, and I've only seen one other story, Minisinoo's 'The Room with a Computer' which has managed to do it with any amount of skill.
Firstly, I loved to see how you portrayed Harry's slow descent into anger and hatred, where he started out with nothing more than his righteous anger and a burning desire to put the Dursleys in their place, but which swiftly spiralled out of control as he was denied the love and support that he needed. I have to say that I was not impressed with either book 6 or book 7 — Harry became 'Dumbledore's man' again far too quickly and turned from the powerful wizard we see in books 1 through 5 into a mere puppet that slacked off and was happy to be led around by the nose in the old man's schemes.
Perhaps the one criticism I would make on this, and it's a minor one, is that I don't think you handled the repetition aspect of the 'Sirius was dead!' theme particularly well. I can see where you were trying to go with it, to emphasise his grief and loss, but something about it just didn't read too well — it didn't flow. To hazard a guess, I'd say you were inspired by David Eddings', 'Cyradis was weeping' at the end of Seeress of Kell, but whether it was the italics, the exclamation mark, or the shortness of the paragraphs between each one, I don't feel that you nailed it. Perhaps removing the italics/exclamation mark, and perhaps shifting a couple of them so they form part of the beginning of a couple of the paragraphs, such as 'Sirius was dead, and still Dumbledore droned...' might work better.
I do think you've got the tone of all the X-cast so far, and in particular Professor Xavier spot on though, both in movie and anime-verse, and I can't help but have Patrick Stewart's dulcet tones running through my head every time he speaks. I sense that you're going to be taking Jean in a direction that's going to be radically different from anything we've seen in all three types of 'canon' before, and that since she'll be acting as very much a mother figure to Harry, we won't be seeing Phoenix any time soon. As for Harry himself, you've taken a bold step with his powers, making them defensive and supporting only, as most would have given him some uber-power with which to smite Voldemort — having them to be a combination of Kurt and Kitty's is a novel way to go, although I can see why certain aspects were needed due to the things he needed to do in chapter 1. Perhaps varying the special effects so they weren't exactly like the operation of their powers would have made them seem less derivative, but that's just a minor stylistic point.
Overall a very good start, and I think Harry's friends are only just beginning to realise the true horror of what they might have started here, although it appears that Ron isn't going to cover himself in glory again. This is certainly shaping up to be the second HP/X-Men crossover that I've really enjoyed. On to Chapter 2!
joeBob posted a comment on Saturday 18th April 2009 9:07am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Harry sends out a "cry for help" that shocks and dismays world-wide, yet Jean and Xavier let him stew (and become more evil) for weeks?
Sure, this oversight was hastily patched -- many many paragraphs too late -- but even that is hardly believable.
Real and decent people would have visited Harry ASAP, even if some shysters had not finished drawing up paperwork.
Robert Robinson posted a comment on Friday 27th March 2009 1:27am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
Hey, where have you two disappeared to? It has been almost a year since you updated this. Hope everything is ok there. Keep in good health, and hope to hear about a new chapter soon. Later!
ShatteredRhapsody posted a comment on Thursday 29th January 2009 6:01am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
What in the hell....Alright, you got me. I've been sniffling and obliterating tissue boxes through this whole chapter. I hope you're happy! Anyhoo, I still loved it.
Fozzie Bear posted a comment on Friday 16th January 2009 6:36am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences
First Harry acts all tough and threatens to kill the Dursley's (which just made him look like an ordinary bully), then he cries about what the world has done to him and is prepared to die. At his own hand no less.
Personal annoyance of weaklings attempting, or even suggesting, suicide aside. It doesn't at all fit. Even if he somehow awoke a different personality when he gained his powers it wouldn't fit. Because then he wouldn't be able to control his powers. Possibly not even be aware of them. He also should have had some difficulties controlling his powers, which seem to be what that black dude from Heroes has and some sort of teleportation ability. From that alone I fear that you'll give him whatever ability you feel like giving him. Just because he should have it. One ability is really more than enough, seeing as he already has his magic. A second one could also be useful, but you should've focused on giving him powers that would compliment his magical powers instead of giving him completely new ones.
This is not Adventure or Comedy. Though admittedly I didn't read more than half of the chapter. Change the genre, and take the two minutes it takes to come up with an acceptable summary. What you have now is just pathetic.
As for the genre, if you want suggestions, angst should be one of them. I'd hassard a guess and say that fluff is going to be a major part of this story.
What I read didn't look at all promising for the rest of the fic. Which is why, even though I at first thought I'd look past my dislike of pathetically weak Harry, I stopped reading before I was through even half of the chapter.
I'll just end the review there.
Miss Millie posted a comment on Sunday 8th January 2017 2:36am for Chapter 01 - Aftermath and Consequences